


The 15th

by ziathebee



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Slow Build, alex has depression and bipolar disorder, alex is trans, and im too lazy to add it in, and this was written before then, bc that only recently became my headcanon, but its not talked about all that much, laf is agender
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-24
Updated: 2016-07-09
Packaged: 2018-06-10 09:38:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 10,844
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6950935
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ziathebee/pseuds/ziathebee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alexander Hamilton- an annoying dork with good intentions, I swear- moves into the same apartment complex as Aaron Burr- resident reserved and polite mystery man- and in an attempt at friendship, Alexander offers the part-time botany enthusiast Aaron a hyacinth sprout which turns into peace offerings of plants every 15th of each month.</p><p>Or the one where Alexander and Aaron are both obsessed with plants, and eventually with each other.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Settling In

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm really excited for this fic!! i've been thinking it up for a little while now and i hope you all like it!! please, feel free to chat with me in the comments! i'm always open for discussion about any number of things <3
> 
> enjoy the fic!

Alexander hadn't been all that nervous about moving out of John Laurens's house. For him, personally, it was not all that odd to be living by himself- his mother had died when he was 12, after all. He had bought a small apartment up University St. in a relatively large complex that did not welcome pets. Thank God for that. He swore that if he was within a five foot radius of another cat he was going to scream. He wasn't going to deal with allergies, not again.

God, John needed to stop adopting cats.

Alexander was just walking from his car with his last box and was heading inside. As he walked he thought aimlessly about how hot it was outside today. The sun was blazing above and practically boiling everyone in Manhattan. It was awful. Good thing Eliza had supplied him with an extremely large amount of sunscreen before he had left John's place. He appreciated the gesture, really, he did, but sometimes Eliza could be such a pain. It was nice to know she was looking out for him though. Despite their break-up many months ago, they remained good friends, which was wonderful, truly.

Anyways, Alexander Hamilton entered the lobby and hummed with satisfaction. Ah, yes, air conditioning. A life saver. Alex lifted his final box into the elevator and was about to press the button to floor 4 when he heard a voice calling from outside and he hastily thrust his hand through the gap in the doors. Soon another man was stumbling inside, panting lightly. A bead of sweat dropped from his jaw and Alex choked on a breath and began to sputter. He quickly covered his mouth with the crook of his elbow to avoid making a fool of himself in front of this random person. This random and very, _very_ handsome person.

Managing to regain his composure in a timely manner, Alex poised himself up straight and offered the dark-skinned man a kind grin. "Floor?" He asked, praying with all his willpower that his voice wasn't as high-pitched as he thought it was.

The mystery man muttered, "F-Four." before continuing to breathe heavily. Alexander paused for but a moment, frozen to the core. That wasn't his floor, was it? Boy, did he hope so. Alex opened his mouth to inquire further regarding this new discovery, but he immediately sighted that the man was staring at him and he darted to the buttons, pressing 4 with his shaking hand. He then slid backward, behind the man again to pick up his box once more. The elevator began to lurch upward and, luckily, Alexander soon felt free of the weight of the other man's eyes burning through his flesh. It was truly a relief.

Alexander found in the meantime that he could hardly avoid glancing at the man, and to his own delight, he did not seem to notice.

In a minute or so the elevator had reached the fourth floor and pulled to a slow stop. Alexander considered requesting the man's name before they parted, but he had raced from the elevator before he was given the chance. So with a little huff of annoyance Alexander headed toward his room, pulling his room key from his pocket with still-trembling hands. He soon found his door- 423- and cast his eyes absentmindedly toward the man entering the room beside his. Scanning up from the man's legs he eventually looked toward his face and suppressed a gasp.

No. Way. That was him! The man from the elevator! A wide smile laced Alex's face and suddenly he was chirping somewhat over-enthusiastically, "Hi! You were in the elevator with me just a second ago, right? Looks like we're neighbors!" Alexander's grin, however, dropped quickly as the man opened up his door and quirked a single eyebrow in his direction, appearing quite aggravated. 

"H-Hey, what did I do?" Alexander asked in a raised voice, striding toward the door that was subsequently closed in his face. Instantly Alex's beam had formed into a firm line and he grumbled something under his breath, unlocking his door without much care for the safety of his final's boxes contents. As soon as he had entered his new home Alex slammed the door behind him and raced to his bathroom to examine his face thoroughly in the mirror.

His face was red with embarrassment and fury and his eyes shone with their usual optimism but also a new flame, one Alex and all those that knew him had seen many times before. Something like ambition, determination, and irritation all mixed into one confusing package. If you asked one of said people who knew Alexander they would probably be able to describe him as a person using only that phrase. But that didn't matter right now, Alex reminded himself impatiently.

 _He must be having a bad day. Maybe something happened at work, I don't know his life... God, why am I getting so fed up about this?_ Alexander interrogated his reflection with squinted eyes, as if he saw an ink smudge on his cheekbone that in the end wasn't there. A lot of the time Alex knew exactly the answer to his own questions, but this was not one of those times, no matter how much he wished it was.

 _Damn it all to hell._ Was the last thought Alex let exit his whirlwind brain before he spun around and began opening boxes, venting his aggravation on excessive amounts of tape stretched across the cardboard boxes. He wouldn't admit to anyone else, for fear that they would consider him insane, but it was soothing to cut things.

After successfully setting up his bookshelf and television set Alexander allowed himself to flop onto the couch and pull a blanket over himself... at exactly 11:02 pm. Ugh. He always had a habit of staying up way too late working, but he didn't care too much. What was now a habit was once an everyday occurrence that eventually resulted in naps during class and visits to the nurse's office. He did not miss those days, not a bit.

Alexander fell asleep on the couch without noticing that he had not eaten. Whatever. He would just do that tomorrow.

God, he was so unhealthy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i've been trying to fix these notes foR EVer and i finally got it thank GOD


	2. May 15th

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i was curious about whether you guys wanted me to turn this into a double-perspective kind of story. one chapter in aaron's perspective and another through alex's? give me your opinion on this idea in the comments if you have the chance. hope you like the chapter!!

Alexander awoke with a strange uncertainty that it was actually morning. He felt awfully tired despite how he seemed to have slept 11 hours. Wait. Woah, woah, woah. Upon checking his phone, he announced to himself that it was 10:13 in the morning. Alex sat up, cringing in the sunlight streaming through his windows. He muttered something meaningless as he threw his blanket aside and stood, stretching his aching limbs out with a wide yawn.

The man stumbled toward his suitcase sitting near the corner of the room. He pulled out a new outfit and changed in the bathroom groggily, brushing his teeth and pulling his dark locks into a ponytail before deciding to go grab some coffee and breakfast, being too drowsy to make his own. Alexander put on his sneakers and checked his pockets for his wallet, car keys, cellphone, and door key. With an accepting nod of his head Alexander wandered from his room, his lips playing into a lazy smile as he waited for the elevator to arrive.

It didn't take long until the doors had opened, and Alexander absentmindedly stepped inside, only to bump into someone with a yelp of shock. He fell backwards but felt a hand gripping his before he could hit the floor. In moments he was being pulled to his feet again and ended up standing face-to-face with the mystery man from yesterday. Quickly Alex grumbled in displeasure and stomped past the man, but he turned to face Alex instead.

Alexander met his eyes for but a second and was disappointed in himself for being so taken aback by those deep brown orbs. Within moments he had recovered, however, and his eyes tore themselves from the other man's, instead taking to staring at the tile below his feet. A familiar awkwardness had filled the space between he and the mysterious man, which was soon cleared by a male voice coming from before Alexander.

"Hey... I'm really sorry about yesterday. I was in a rush to get home and I was being an ass. My name is Aaron Burr, if that makes it up to you." The man said in a low, gentle tone. Alex brought his eyes up to Aaron's again and flashed him a soft grin.

"Alexander Hamilton." He introduced, voice just about as calm as he could make it, which in the end, was hardly calm whatsoever. But Burr returned the polite smile, which Alexander took as a good sign. "And about the making it up to me part... maybe. If we could have dinner together at some point, that would make it up to me...?" Alex added, his smile turning into a flirtatious smirk. Meanwhile, Aaron's expression seemed to morphing from emotion to emotion as if it could not decide which one to go with. Alex worried for a little while that he had made Aaron uncomfortable, but soon the other male's face had settled on a teasing fondness, if only a little hesitant.

"We'll see." Burr replied with a shrug and a waggle of one eyebrow before he hastily pressed the 'close doors' button and took one big step backward, out of the elevator. Alexander yelled toward him, but the doors had already pulled themselves shut. He huffed in aggravation and then pressed the button for floor 1.

Stupid gorgeous Burr, avoiding him. Whatever. He'd crack him eventually, like Hamilton did so easily with every other person he had ever met. He always figured them out, no matter how long it took or how much energy it drained from him. Alex was in fact flooded with tidal waves of unbridled energy 24/7, which in general meant some loss meant just about nothing to him. Just ask John or Herc or Angelica, or some other friend of his. Or Jefferson. Ha.

Speaking of Angelica, Alexander's phone suddenly rang and he reached into his jeans pocket with a small chuckle, answering the eldest Schuyler sister's phone call.

"Hello Alexander." She said sweetly.

"Hi, Angelica. What's up?"

The elevator began moving downward toward the lobby but Alexander hardly seemed to notice. Talking with Angelica was always a pleasure. She was a wonderful woman, though Alexander was never all that interested in her for anything other than friendship. According to Eliza, however, the feelings were not mutual, or at least weren't up until now. Angelica was joyfully single and without a love interest nowadays, or at least she said so. Alex wasn't sure if he believed that, but he kept his musings to himself, unlike usual.

"I was just curious about your new apartment. Is it nice there? Got any _fascinating_ neighbors?" Alexander could just _hear_ the woman's brows wiggling. Of course she would phrase her question so sexually. That was something she did quite often. Not that Alex necessarily minded this quirk of hers, though on occasion it did grow a tad annoying. For now Alex just laughed.

"It's nice, I guess. And, well," Alexander paused, wondering if he should _really_ tell Angelica about Burr. She wouldn't let him hear the end of it. When his lips first pulled apart he intended to lie, but then the elevator doors separated and he was suddenly rambling on about his handsome neighbor. "There's Aaron Burr. He's crazy hot, you should just _see_ him Angie! That jaw and those lips and goddamn, those _eyes_...!" It took Alexander a moment or two to realize that silence had fallen upon the opposite side of the phone and he stopped short, waiting outside the apartment complex door for his friend to reply.

He did get what he wanted in about ten seconds, but it sure as hell wasn't what Alexander had expected. "You have a crush on _Aaron Burr?_ You mean the 16-year-old _prodigy_ of Princeton? The _insanely_ persuasive debater? _That_ Aaron Burr?"

"Wait, you've heard of him?"

"Of course I have! I've met him!"

Alexander paused and then laughed quietly as he climbed into his car, slumping back against the driver's seat as he considered this fresh knowledge. Prodigy of Princeton College? _16 years old?_ Alex didn't know Aaron all that well, obviously, but he never would have suspected he was a child genius of all things! Alex hummed with satisfaction as he continued his chat with Angelica, still cheerfully surprised by the eagerness in her voice.

"Neat. Hey, do you know what stuff he likes? As in gifts? I want to be friends with him, but I didn't exactly get the chance to converse with him about all the surely interesting hobbies he has." Alexander really could not believe he was asking Angelica Schuyler for advice on this, but it seemed like she knew Burr relatively well, so this shouldn't backfire on him.

Hopefully.

Anyways, Angelica giggled like a schoolgirl and cooed, "Oooh, someone's in _deeeep!_ " Alexander rolled his eyes. "No but seriously, he's pretty into botany, as far as I remember. I haven't seen him in a few years, so I'm not sure if that's correct, but it's worth a shot, right?" Alex harnessed all his self-control to avoid clapping ecstatically.

"Yes, yes! Thank you, Angie!" Hamilton cheered, balancing his phone between his jawline and shoulder as he drove across the street to Starbucks. He was lucky he hadn't crashed his car already, considering he was low on his necessary morning caffeine and his mind was absolutely twirling with thought currently. But he did not, and Alexander was more grateful for this fact than he had been in a long time.

As he pulled his automobile to a stop in the Starbucks parking lot he heard Angelica laugh again, which caused a tiny smile to blossom on his face. "Sure, sure. It's nothing, really. You need a boyfriend anyways." She teased. Alexander scoffed, pushing open the Starbucks door and approaching the counter, joining the line made up of a pair of people waiting to order as well.

"Shut your mouth, Angelica." He replied, tone just as playful as hers. Angie made a noise like a child sticking her tongue out at her sibling and he rolled his eyes again, but he remained quite pleased that Angelica had decided to call him today. He had been needing a conversation as light as this one for a few days. He had a lot on his mind. Nothing extremely important, though.

"You know it's true." The Schuyler sister shot back coolly.

"Whatever Angie. I'm getting brunch, okay? Talk to ya later." He hung up after Angelica chirped her goodbye, and slipped his phone into his pocket from whence it came.

And as he ordered his iced coffee and three blueberry muffins he could not help but squeal near-silently with anticipation. He was originally going to head straight home and watch Netflix while he ate and then continue unpacking, but buying Aaron a plant sounded much more exciting to him. He already knew just where to go.

The Nursery; a small flower shop owned by the Washingtons down on Cypress St.. George and Martha Washington had been good friends of his mother's, long ago, when she was still alive. Taking a sip of his coffee Alex shuddered at the painful thought, but pushed out the unwelcome attack of sadness that came with the common reminder Rachel Hamilton was truly gone. Alexander knew he'd never get over her loss.

But that wasn't important, at least not now. Alexander got back into his car once more, setting his brown paper bag full of muffins on the passenger seat as he began to drive again. Time to head toward the Nursery.

He wondered what kind of flowers Aaron liked. He supposed he would simply guess and pray to God Aaron didn't hate them.

By the time he reached the comfy little floral shop his heard was pounding out of his chest with excitement. He hadn't been to this place in at least a decade, but he was very happy to see it had not changed during his absence. The outer walls were still a sweet pastel yellow color decorated with light green vines and flowers painted across them. Beneath the two windows on either side of the front door were planting boxes filled to the brims with a rainbow of colorful morning glories, which made Alexander smile gently. He remembered his mother holding his hand and letting him smell the flowers before leading him inside and letting him run off to examine the many types of plants while she had a chat with the Washingtons.

Wonderful memories.

Alex opened the door to hear the same old nostalgic bell ring above him upon his entrance, and he chuckled. Yep, definitely the same one from 10 years ago. No doubt about it. It sounded a bit worn out.

Then Martha was shuffling out from behind the counter with shocked glee in her voice and written all over her face. "Alexander?" She inquired, wiping her hands on a blue washcloth and then approaching him with a look in her eyes like he had grown a second head. Alex offered the woman a calm wave and she burst into laughter, wrapping her arms around him. "Oh, Alexander! It has been so long! How are you, hon'?" Alexander's laughter chimed in with hers and soon George had come out after his wife and he looked just as surprised.

"Hello, son!" He greeted happily, approaching the embracing pair with a fond smile on his face. He gave Alexander a familiar pat on the back. Alex could see in his memories George giving him that exact same friendly pat once upon a time, years ago.

"Hi George! I'm doing great, Martha, thank you for asking." Alex greeted, grin still stretched from ear to ear. He couldn't believe anyone could be so happy to see him again.

"What brings you here?" Martha asked as she separated from Alexander, instead taking George's place as he walked off to serve at the cash register.

"I actually wanted to buy a plant to give to my..." He trailed off slowly, pondering what to call Aaron. Friend? No, no. Nowhere close. In fact, that was the whole point of this expedition! Acquaintance? Yes, that would work. "...acquaintance, Aaron." Alexander finished with a firm nod.

"What does he like? Flowers? We have plenty of those, I assure you." Martha put in, chuckling sweetly.

Alex just shrugged. "Sure." He assumed that would work.

"Alright. What type?" Martha added, turning toward the greenhouse not too far away. It was out the back door, according to what Alex had seen of the outside of her and George's facility.

"Surprise me." He called after her, and Martha just laughed and nodded, yelling something over her shoulder Alexander didn't quite catch. He leaned against the counter to wait for her return, impatiently pulling his phone out and checking the time. 10:47 am. Huh. It wasn't as late as he thought it was. It seemed like he'd left his apartment two hours ago. Seemed he was wrong.

George asked him about what he was doing these days and they had a decent conversation about his career in law before Martha entered the room again, holding a tiny pot with a small green sprout coming out of it in her gloved hands. She placed it on the glass counter next to Alexander and he looked it over with a smile. It was so cute and small. He wondered what it would grow up to be. Immediately, as if she had read his mind, Martha was answering said question.

"Hyacinth. Three dollars." She informed. All Alex knew about said plant was that it smelled nice, or at least would by its adulthood. So instead of saying anything that may make him appear a fool he dipped his head, pulled out his wallet and offered George three dollars. The man took his payment and placed it in the register as Alexander picked up his coffee and baby flower and exited the shop, waving goodbye to the Washingtons.

Alexander entered his car again and made the quick drive back to the apartment complex. His heart only pounded harder and harder as he stepped into the elevator and ascended the floors.

But soon he was on floor 4. Alex quickly unlocked his apartment door, putting his coffee and muffins down on the couch before turning around toward Aaron's door and knocking, still holding the small hyacinth sprout in his hands. Alex's smile grew wider when he heard Aaron's footsteps behind the door and then he opened it, breathing a sigh of frustration into the air. "What, Hamilton?" He asked before noticing the plant Alexander was holding onto.

"I wanted to give you this." Alex answered, enthusiastically ushering the potted sprout Aaron's way. The dark-skinned man took it hesitantly and exchanged glances with the baby plant and Alexander, who was waiting for some form of appreciation.

Finally Burr said calmly, "Thanks..." Before turning on his heel and closing the door behind him, plant in hand.

Alex stood there for a few moments more before returning to his apartment, shaking with leftover nerves and excitement.

Then he tossed himself onto the couch squealing. Within a few seconds he'd realized his coffee was on it alongside him and he sat up instantly, whirling around to grab his iced coffee which had fallen and made a spot on the cushion. He sighed with aggravation, though his eyes still sparkled with joy as he raced to the kitchen for his paper towels and Folex carpet cleaner. He sprayed the cushion and turned on the TV while he waited for the chemicals to sink into the fabric.

Thus he began to eat his muffins, though he was still trembling from head-to-toe.

May 15th had been a good day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i love hyacinths they smell awesome
> 
> that's all i have to say lmao


	3. Theodosia

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THIS CHAPTER TOOK FOREVER TO WRITE BECAUSE I KEPT FORGETTING ABOUT IT, BUT HERE IT IS LMAO

Alexander awoke at exactly 1:00 am with the TV blaring and shining bright on a Saturday. He clenched his eyes shut, grumbling and trying to turn around so he was facing the back of the couch, but as he lay there he began to notice the sound of shuffling in Aaron's apartment. Alex, worried, sat up quickly, pausing the documentary playing on his television and fell totally silent, trying to figure out what Burr could possibly be doing this early in the morning. Alex didn't know much about his neighbor, but he was pretty sure it was kinda crazy for him to be awake at 1 in the morning.

When quiet enraptured Alexander's apartment and soon Aaron's as well, Alex let his heartbeat begin to slow with peace as he sunk into his blanket. He had been laying there for at least five minutes before suddenly the sound of glass shattering in Burr's apartment filled the air and Alexander was immediately darting from the couch. He hastily snatched his door key before throwing his door open and knocking impatiently on Aaron's.

"Aaron? Are you okay?" The man called in a sorta-whisper through his neighbor's door and he could faintly hear groaning and the noisy clattering of glass shards being clanked together. Soon the door was opening slowly and Aaron stood there. He looked _awful._

Beneath his eyes were dark, heavy bags and his lips were sticky. His voice was hoarse and the perimeter of his eyes was a thick, puffy line of red. Alex was, as any person would be, concerned for Aaron. _Very_ concerned.

"A-Aaron...? Let me in, please..." Alexander pressed gently.

"Go back to bed Alexander. I'm," Aaron paused to hiccup, "I'm f-ine." His breath smelled like alcohol, Alex noted. He took this as a bad sign. Alexander, without a second to spare, shook his head stoutly and then pressed one of his cold palms against the door, pushing it open. Aaron seemed too weak to fight back, and instead slid backward, out of the door's way as Alexander stepped inside.

Alex looked around to find that everything was normal, except for the shattered bottle of gin laying on the floor near the entryway to Aaron's kitchen. Alexander passed Aaron a look of disappointment and then took a small hop over the glass to find his friend's broom set. He found it beside the refrigerator and groggily swept up the shards into the basket and threw them away, placing a folded towel atop the spill. It would dry overnight.

Meanwhile, Aaron stood nearby, purposefully avoiding Alex's gaze. He was swaying slightly. Eventually he spoke, however. "A-Alex, go home."

Alexander made his way over to Burr and shook his head once more. "No." He replied coolly. He scooped up Aaron's blanket that rest upon the couch. "C'mon, to bed you go, Burr." The man ushered Burr down the hallway and he moaned with displeasure.

"I can't sleep, Alex, just let me be." Aaron pushed, ceasing his movement in front of Alex.

Alexander sighed. "Aaron, just get some rest." Aaron rolled his eyes in reply. The worst part of this whole situation was that Aaron and Alex were both as stubborn as rams. 

Alexander gave Aaron a soft shove down the hallway, leading Aaron toward his bedroom with assistance from the drowsy and reluctant drunk. Soon Aaron had flopped onto his mattress, and Alex gently pulled a blanket over the tired man. Aaron curled up beneath it and Alexander clenched his fists in order to avoid leaning down to plant a kiss on Burr's forehead. He needed to control his urges, no matter how much affection he possessed for Aaron.

So, once Burr fell into a calm breathing pattern Alexander turned on his heel and exited the room, closing the door behind him. He shuffled into the living room and took a deep breath to calm his pounding heart.

God, he had been _in Aaron's room._ Alexander gripped his key hard and then looked down at it laying in his palm, pondering whether or not to head home. Then he cast his dark brown gaze toward the hallway and shook his head, taking a seat on Aaron's couch. He grabbed a blanket and let sleep grip his brain and darkness cover him.

But something was off. 

Within seconds Alex found his eyes shooting open again and he sat there, the room devoid of any light. He examined his surroundings, through the darkness. He was thinking to himself, _Nothing interesting,_ when suddenly his eyes rested on the very sprout he had bought a week ago. A tiny gasp escaped him and he scrambled off the couch, toward the small baby flower.

Upon closer inspection Alexander found that Aaron had stretched a piece of masking tape across the front of the small pot and written on it in blue sharpie marker was the word, 'Theodosia.'

Alex tilted his head slightly as he tested the name quietly on his tongue, "Theodosia." He had not heard it before, but he supposed he liked it. It was quite beautiful.

Anyways, Alexander, thoughts still on the name Aaron had apparently given the hyacinth, returned to his resting place and shut his eyes, finally allowing himself to _actually_ sleep. He really needed some rest, but it took him at least a half hour to actually fall asleep. But eventually the night overcame him and he was dead asleep.

\--

Alexander Hamilton was _not_ a morning person. Goddamn, it was _far_ too bright.

Alex's eyes fluttered open again, as they always did, every day. Sometimes Alex wished, only to himself, that he would stay fast asleep forever. Life was a bit of a pain in the ass, but...

Alexander let out a sigh as he rose from the couch, stretching his arms and forcing his eyes open so that he would adapt faster to the sunlight. The man mumbled angrily at the sun for existing and making his life a living hell. Only then, upon noticing the light blue color of the walls and the small plant resting upon the windowsill, did he realize this was not his apartment. Alex was rising from the couch when he heard a small sound coming from the hallway and he paused.

"Ahem."

And then his gaze traveled toward the hallway to see none other than Aaron Burr leaning against the doorway and a scarlet warmth climbed up his cheeks. "Uh... h-hi, Aaron." He said, sounding about as nervous as he looked.

"Why are you still in my house?" Aaron shot back calmly.

"I stayed just to make sure you wouldn't hurt yourself. You were asleep, but you were also drunk." Alex was trying to sound as cool-tempered as Burr, but it was _incredibly_ difficult with those gorgeous eyes staring him down.

A silence fell between the both of them for a minute or two, glaring at one another.

Then Hamilton looked away and a smirk graced Aaron's dark face. A thought came to Alex's mind as his orbs drifted downward toward his lap.

"Hey... Burr...? Why is the hyacinth labeled 'Theodosia?'"

This seemed to shut Aaron up completely. His pupils narrowed and eyebrows furrowed and he took a single menacing step toward Alexander, growling softly. "Alexander... please... please leave." He said softly.

"A-Aaron? Are you okay...?" Alexander said gently, standing slowly and reaching out to place one hand on Burr's shoulder. Burr jerked backward violently, shaking his head.

"Leave, Alexander." He hissed.

Alexander was trembling now, and he nodded his head vigorously, scooping his key off the coffee table quickly and then whirling around, walking through the door. But he swore that as soon as he was outside the door he heard Aaron mutter only two words,

"Thank you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the feels are REAL


	4. June 15th

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just fyi, i'm going to be at disneyworld all of next week, so i'm afraid updates will be scarce or not at all. however, after next sunday, everything will be back on track, i promise! love u guys!! thanks for the kudos and comments!! xx

Things were different after that night.

Alexander found that his sightings of Aaron were incredibly lacking. Guilt crept up on him slowly over a number of days, but he refused to let it drag him down. He got a job at John and Laf's coffee shop and with them by his side it was far easier to forget that Aaron was purposefully avoiding him.

But after work some days he would lay down for bed and his thoughts of Burr would make his skin crawl with memories of the shattered glass, the fury in Aaron's eyes, his passive-aggressive, 'Ahem,' all of it. Then after he was absolutely finished putting up with it for the night he would climb out of bed and slink into the kitchen groggily. He'd make himself a cup of coffee and open up his laptop and start looking at pictures of flowers. Sure, it made his heart ache just slightly, but that was only when hyacinths came up. Alex would force himself to close the tab and continue peacefully.

Eventually he came across a website talking about flower language. Being the altogether curious man he was, Alexander, with much vigor, studied the site inside and out until he had only one page to read.

_'Hyacinths.'_

As his cursor hovered over the word he paused. _God, why am I so nervous about this? Everything's fine. He doesn't hate you. Maybe he just thinks I'm scared of him or it'll be awkward or... something._ Alexander thought to himself, sipping his black coffee. Then, somewhat hesitantly, Alex clicked on the link.

"Blue represent constancy, purple represents sorrow and apology..." Alexander whispered to himself, taking a mental note of the information. "What color is our hyacinth?" He inquired the air, glancing over his shoulder as if it were possible to look straight through the wall between himself and Aaron. Ha... 'our.' He found the statement sort of amusing, considering the fact that Aaron would never let the two of them be a 'we' in the first place. Alex let out a puff of air and returned his full focus to the website, trying not to cry. Enough pity parties. He would just have to find out what color it was himself, he decided.

And you know what? He had an idea.

Alex shut his laptop, chugged the remainder of his coffee, and put on a documentary, laying down once again. Within fifteen minutes he was dead asleep. God, documentaries were so boring.

\--

It was 9 in the morning when Alexander woke up, and he instantly pulled himself from bed, making some coffee while he scanned over the flower language list. Yes... yes, he knew what he wanted to buy. Alex drank his coffee so fast it might as well have been a shot and then grabbed his things, turning around and leaving his room. His hopes at seeing Aaron were dashed as he made his way down the stairs, into the lobby, and outside.

He hopped into his car without hesitation and drove himself down to the Nursery. He put on a gentle smile as he walked into the building. There it was, the sound of the bells. It was so reassuring, though Alex could not explain why.

He waved to George who was at his post behind the counter, and Martha approached him soon afterward, giving him a tender hug. "Why hello, Alex! What do you need?" She asked, voice as sweet as sugar and laughter warm like fresh-baked pie. She was enveloped in the mixed scent of flowers, which made Alexander's grin tug farther at the corners of his lips. He felt more welcome here than he had felt in any other place for many years.

"Would you happen to have azaleas? I believe they are a year-round flower, so surely you do..." He trailed off when Martha offered him a firm nod and whirled around, heading toward the greenhouse. Alexander turned to face George, who was giving him an odd look.

"Why are you suddenly so interested in flowers, son?" He asked. Alex would have been intimidated by the 6'2'' man if not for the fond edge in his eyes and voice.

Alexander replied with an awkward laugh, placing his hand behind his neck. "Well... I moved into a new apartment and my neighbor Aaron... he, uh... he doesn't like me all that much. But what he does like is botany. So I've been buying him flower sprouts for him to raise." He said. George's laugh boomed through the room and Alexander felt warmth rising on his face. But George said nothing else, as Martha returned to the room with a small pot in her hands, very similar to the hyacinth one.

The sprout was just as small as the hyacinth, vibrant green and a little bit twisted, but in the natural sort of way. There were multiple leaves stretching out in a fan atop the vine. It was cute.

Alex gave George his three dollars and then walked out, calling a hasty goodbye to the Washingtons.

He got into his car more excited than ever and made the short drive home. He practically ran into the apartment complex and into the elevator. He almost missed the button for floor 4. His hands were shaking like they hadn't shaken before.

But soon the elevator had reached the fourth floor and he dashed out, smiling far too widely as he knocked on Aaron's door. The man's familiar groan filled the air and Alex forced back a snort of amusement.

Then the door opened and Burr stood there, holding his nose and shaking his head. "Oh my god, Hamilton, what in the world do you-" He began incredulously. But Alex cut him off by shoving the azalea his way. In that moment when their eyes met- call me cliche- time seemed to stop. Aaron dark brown eyes seemed to be staring deep into him, researching him, trying to figure out what was going on. But Alex managed to speak despite his anxiety.

"Azalea: temperance; take care of yourself." Alexander announced, as if by memory. Then he turned around, leaving Aaron to his shock, azalea sprout in his hands. Alexander entered his own room, smiling gently as he took a seat on his couch, picking up his laptop and returning to the flower language website to calm his nerves. Hopefully Burr liked it, though Alex wasn't sure.

And the world continued to spin as if nothing had ever happened.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> website i'm going to be using from here on out for flower language: http://thelanguageofflowers.com


	5. A Revolution

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im sorry this took so long!! hope you like it!! also, lots of angst in this chapter. oops.

The world keeps spinning. Day in, day out, the earth rotates, as it always does. Nothing feels all that different.

Throughout the first week post-azalea Alex finds that he doesn't see Aaron at all, just like before. Oftentimes when he goes to bed at night he wonders if Aaron hates him. I mean, it wasn't much of a stretch, considering their past experiences together, but Alexander wishes it was not so. He wants Aaron to care about him the same way he does, but he understands the hopelessness of his whole situation.

With this crushing realization, upon the ninth day after he offered Aaron the azalea, Alex finds himself curled up on his bed, half finished with a bottle of whiskey and crying his eyes out into a pillow. Occasionally he will get up and wipe his eyes and tell himself he's done, but then the tears return and he continues to feel pathetic.

There are fuzzy whispers in his head and a tightly-tied knot in his stomach that tell him he's incapable of being loved by a living being. His eyes burn, his face is sticky from tears and alcohol and sweat. Beneath his eyes are dark bruises and his hair is matted. He ponders aloud every once in a while, "Why did she have to die?" or "Why do they live in _fucking_ France?" All useless questions, ones without answers, but they hit Alexander harder than a strike to the head.

He takes another swig of whiskey to try and calm the raging storm in his gut but he still feels sick to his stomach, brain haunted by wisps of anger and misery and _why why why why why...?_

Alexander Hamilton is the sort of drunk that once deep in the bottle he'll begin to grow philosophical and talk, somehow, even more than he does sober. About even stranger things. But those close to him often mention how truly fascinating drunken Alex's conversations are.

Currently Alex is considering the correlation between his life and the rotating of the planet on which he lives. "A rotation is a day, but to me sometimes it feels like an eternity. Or sometimes like two seconds. Days mean nothing- rotations mean nothing and have no purpose but the creation of night and day... but a _revolution_... what does that mean? Much more, probably... an entire year, 365 days, surely has some m-meaning?" His voice crackles on the final word and then suddenly Alexander is sobbing again, tears tasting like salt on his tongue as they trail down his face, pooling in a small, sinking puddle on his pillowcase.

Just like that Alex cannot stop thinking about his mother, and his friends, and Eliza, and all the people he's hurt and all the ones that have hurt him. Nothing seems real, it feels like he's floating, or at least he is trying; but then gravity is pushing him back to earth and a battle is being waged between the fake and the actual.

_Alexander... your mother, she... she has passed._

It's a shame you didn't go with her.

_Alex, I'm sorry but... we have to break up._

You're so stupid you can't keep a romantic partner for more than 6 months.

_Leave, Alexander._

You're so awful. You have no care for anyone's personal space, you asshole.

"But they _don't._ " Alex remarks coldly, hands clenching into shaking fists around his mattress. He grips his sheets so tight his knuckles go ivory and he bites his lip so hard the taste of copper floods his senses. "Th-They haven't, for _so. Long._ " Alexander's dark eyes drift toward his wrists and for a moment he wonders. Then he shakes his head and lifts his gaze and breathes deeply.

He reaches over to hold his own hand for purposes of grounding himself and feels his pulse with two fingers pressed against a pale pink scar. His heart is somewhat fast, but going relatively steady. The hurricane in his head calms. Everything is fine. Mostly.

Alexander's black eyes carry over to the bottle of Jack Daniel's and he lets out a sigh. He grabs the cap with a lazy hand and screws it back on, still trembling slightly. Then he snatches the blanket and pulls it over his body into a cocoon that enraptures his whole body. The blanket is somewhat moist from his heavy sweating and spilled alcohol, but at this point Alex hardly cares. He just lets his eyes flutter shut and lays there in the malevolent darkness. A feeling of dread for the oncoming morning holds his heart tight.

Alexander doesn't get a second of sleep that night.

\--

The morning is unbearably bright, and Alex cringes as his eyes open. The sunlight burns his retinas and his head pounds heavy like a drum. He hides his face beneath the blanket and rolls over to face his nightstand. His hand blindly travels downward toward the second drawer and he drags it open, grabbing a container full of ibuprofen. He swallows down two red pills and then lays his head back on the sweat-drenched pillow.

He plans to lay in bed all day. He grabs his phone that rests to his right on the mattress. John and Laf will understand. He dials John quickly. His best friend answers on the third ring.

"Hi Alex. What's up?" John says. Alex can practically hear him smiling. Laurens is always a ray of sunshine- really a delight, but right now Alexander really isn't in the mood to face the sun. In more ways than one.

"Hi." Alexander notes that his voice comes out as some sort of sobbing croak. He straightens his throat speedily, but he knows that John is already concerned.

"Alex, are you okay?" The other man asks, worry oozing from his voice.

"Yeah, I'm fine, just..." He pauses to shudder as the cloud once covering the sun drifts away, making the rays of light shine even brighter in his face. He winces again, but continues on. "Really, really hungover." Alex chuckled slightly. "Would it be okay if I stay home today? I really can't handle going to work with this migraine, I'm sorry."

John laughed a little, but he still sounded somewhat concerned. "Okay, that's fine, Alex." John said, although he didn't necessarily sound finished, Alex was sure of it. Then his assumption was proved correct as John began to speak again, and Alexander groaned. "Hey, why are you getting drunk on a weekd-"

"Haaaaa, talk to you later John! Hopefully tomorrow! Byeeee!" Alexander chirped throatily. He could hear John attempting to butt in but Alex had ended the call before John could say a full word.

Then he tossed his phone aside and thrashed back onto the bed, scowling in the sunshine. He needed coffee. But he could do without the sun shining in his face if he ended up rising out of bed. He didn't care enough. Instead he turned over, pulling the blanket with him. _We'll just stay here. Forever. And ever. And maybe die here; that would be nice._ He grumbled audibly, remembering with a pang in his heart the pathetic events that transpired the night before.

God, he was sad.

Alexander lay there, eyes fully open and staring at his blanket when suddenly he heard a knocking from the living room. He fell completely silent, eyes widening immensely. His first thought was, _Well fuck._ and then there was, _Well! I'm definitely not getting up now._

"Alexander? Alexander, are you in there?" A voice called, somewhat muffled by the walls keeping the two apart. Alex couldn't quite figure out who the voice belonged to, but he mused silently that the usage of his full name gave a few hints. He didn't have the energy to put all his effort into cracking this code, though. Not today. Alex let quiet fall upon him, waiting for another knock or call of his name.

Then silence fell, and Alex smiled gently. Seems they had left. Alexander breathed a sigh of relief and rested his head again. For a moment he considered the options on who it was, but when his a bolt of pain struck his head he stopped.

And then he heard the soft clinking noises of... what was that, bobby pins? Alex recognized the sound though he wasn't sure why-

Wait. Wait, wait, wait, holy shit, holy shit, holy _shit._ His door was opened. He could tell. The sound of air flowing into the living room was evident and shuffling feet wandering the carpet. Alexander sat up in bed, cringing from the sunlight. But for right now he could deal with his thundering migraine. Someone just broke into his apartment. This was far more dire of a situation.

Alex was shaking like a madman when the door cracked open slightly and suddenly all the breath in Alex's lungs poured out, the wind totally knocked out of him.

"Aa...Aaron?" Alexander stuttered, looking up at the man with awe.

Aaron looked even more concerned than John had sounded earlier, and that was saying something, especially when Aaron wasn't all that expressive of a man. Aaron made a little, forced smile and managed a small, "Hey."

"Why did you break into my apartment? Also, how do you know how to pick a lock? You don't seem like a criminal. But I guess you could make a pretty good one, if I'm being honest here. That's a compliment." Alex didn't notice he was rambling with nervousness until Aaron rolled his eyes.

"Oh my god Alexander, be quiet. Why were you sobbing all of last night?" Aaron asked, eyebrows quirked and lips formed into a frown. Alex went totally pale when he finished speaking. No. No, no, no, no, no. There was _no_ way Aaron heard him hosting his own private pity party. There was _no. Fucking. Way._

"Wh-What do you mean? I wasn't crying, psh, no, why would I do that? I'm fine!" Alex said, laughing anxiously.

Aaron shook his head. "Alexander, you're an awful liar. Please, tell me." He said, resting one palm on Alexander's shoulder. Alex knew from the warmth gathering in his face that he evidently flushed at the contact.

"I'm... I'm fi..." Alex stopped and met Burr's gaze for one moment. His eyes were so filled with sympathy and sadness and evident fondness, it broke Alex's heart. Then just like that the tears were spilling over again.

"I um... I'm uh... I'm really depressed? The stress of school just sort of broke me down? And my girlfriend broke up with me and... and I-I don't know. All of my life I've just felt kind of useless? M-M-My dad left, my mom died, my entire town was destroyed? Most of my close friends live in France... I... I just feel so alone." Alexander's voice was cracking more and more on every word and Aaron's expression grew softer and softer as he spoke.

Aaron took a seat on the edge of the bed and Alexander fell forward, face crashing into Aaron's chest. "I'm so sor-ry..." He choked out into Aaron's t-shirt.

Aaron paused, hands hovering confusedly in the air before he lowered them down onto Alex's back, rubbing them up and down his spine. "Alex, you don't have to apologize. I'm here if you need someone to talk to, okay? I'm not the best at comforting, but... but for you, I'm around." Aaron immediately paused as Alex let out a little gasp and lifted his head. He wiped off his face with the back of his hand, laughing very lightly.

Aaron pulled back and gave Alex a look of bewilderment. "What?" Alexander smirked.

"You called me Alex." He sounded incredibly smug.

"Oh my fucking god Alex I swear-" Aaron began to shout. But then he was cut off by Alex jumping forth and wrapping his arms tight around Aaron. A warm silence fell over the room and then Aaron returned the embrace.

"Thank you." Alex said gently.

And after a few long moments Aaron pulled away and rose to his feet, sending a disapproving look at Alexander as he noticed the whiskey. He grabbed it on his way out and Alex yelped in irritation. "Aaron-" He tried to stand, but then the light of the sun hit his pupils again and he hissed and fell down onto the bed again.

"Bye _Alexander._ This is mine now." And then he had left.

"You clever bastard." Alexander muttered, still grinning. The man laid back down on the bed, pulling the blanket over him once more. He needed sleep. And coffee.

Shit, he should have asked Aaron to make him coffee. And about the lock-picking. And oh my fucking god, he should have asked about the flowers. Shit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> precious children


	6. La Révolutionnaire Cafe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> woops i have taken a while to make this chapter, sorry! but here i am lmao
> 
> alsooooo shameless self-advertising GO! hey so if group chats and disneyworld are ur thing read my other fic 'congratulations' which is about just that, but with all ur favorite hamilton characters!! anyways, hope u like this chapter!!

Alex awakens later that night, shaking from his most recent nightmare. He takes a quick glance at the alarm clock. 10:10, it reads. He sighs softly and tries to close his eyes again, but he can't help but notice the stickiness coating his face and hands. His face is covered in sweat and he swears he is burning up.

Alexander huffs and pushes himself out of bed, stumbling over to the bathroom. He grabs a moist towelette from a small box sitting on the shelf beside the sink and wipes down his face and washes his hands, throwing away the little cloth. The man lifted his gaze to the mirror and inhaled slowly. After a few seconds of silence he released the breath and turned around, flipping the light switch and leaving the restroom. He climbed into bed and pulled the blanket quickly over him, shutting his eyes.

He knew he wouldn't get any more sleep tonight, but he couldn't bear to get up and grab his laptop. So in the meantime he would let himself think. And it seems that the only thing his brain can focus on currently is the nightmare he'd had previously. Alexander shakes his head and rests it upon the pillow again. He cannot afford the memories that would flood back if he remembered.

So he lays there, staring straight at the alarm clock blaring unreadable red numbers. Alex's eyes are watery from sleep- or maybe from a lack thereof- and as the water evaporates from his hands they grow uncomfortably dry and he grumbles. But he doesn't care enough to stand up and moisturize his hands so he continues to lay there, orbs blankly examining his alarm clock.

Then he begins to slip into the cool grips of sleep and he tries to wake up, tries to open his eyes or move or _something_ , but within moments he is fast asleep.

And the nightmare comes rushing back.

_It is dark out. The clouds have rolled in, black and stretching for miles upon miles upon miles across the giant expanse of sky. To the right of the Hamiltons' household is the ocean, once calm and serene, now thrashing wildly and reeking of salt somehow more potently than normal._

_Alexander could hear the rain pounding against his crumbling home's roof and the wind had already shattered a window near the front door. Alex heard the crackling of a branch separating off a tree and then hitting the wall. All around him the walls were crumbling and the bookshelves rattling. The ocean was raging nearby. Alex could simply hear the waves thundering and the lightning crashing outside._

_He was supposed to have hidden in the basement but he couldn't move. His bones were screaming at him to run but he couldn't do it. Then the last picture of his mother fell off the shelf and broke with a **crash** against the ground and why why why why why-_

Alexander awoke with a scream, shooting up out of bed. He jumped off the mattress and sprinted into the bathroom, staring at his reflection and panting, throat hoarse and eyes filled to the brim with tears. His forehead was visibly shining from sweat and his hair appeared greasy. He bit his lip and stuttered out a, "You're okay, Alexander." despite his immense shortness of breath.

He grabbed a rag and wiped off his face in a rush, whirling around and taking out a lazily-put together outfit from his dresser and then returning to the restroom. He turned on the cold water and took a seat upon the floor of his shower, shaking slightly. The icy water was invigorating but his mind was still cloaked in heavy fog. All he could imagine was the clouds, the rain, the lightning, the crackling, the glass; glass _everywhere_ -

Alexander bit his lip even harder than before and stood up, quickly working through his shower routine before exiting the shower. Alex brushed his hair and teeth and got dressed. He grabbed his phone and key and wallet and abandoned the apartment. He needed to get out of there. He needed to get to work, too. It was Monday after all.

Alex couldn't wait to see Lafayette and John.

Alexander stepped into the elevator, mind bogged down with different thoughts all swirling into one like a spiraling blizzard. Everything was too much, too much, _too much_ -

Then a man joined him inside the elevator and settled a hand upon his shoulder. "Alexander."

Alex's mind cleared and he looked up at the dark man and a soft smile graced his face. "Aaron." He said gently. Aaron grinned back, laughing slightly and pulling away. He pressed the button for floor 1 and leaned against the elevator wall. Alex couldn't help but feel somewhat nervous beneath Aaron's deep brown gaze, but also strangely... safe. Alex wondered if Aaron actually care about protecting him. His orbs traveled toward Burr and he caught a glimpse of Aaron's eyes upon him and his smile transformed into a tiny smirk as Burr averted his eyes. He hummed nonchalantly.

"Are you doing alright?" Came Aaron's sudden voice from beside Alexander as the doors pulled shut. He sounded concerned. Alexander didn't find this all that shocking, though perhaps he should have. But Alex was too blinded by the dart of pride that came with his hunch being proven correct by Aaron's blatant worry for him.

Alexander chuckled only a little bit. "Yep." The man replied simply without anything more to offer Aaron but an indifferent shrug. Alexander could barely hear a little hiss of annoyance escape Aaron's lips and he resisted the urge to laugh out loud.

The elevator lurched to a stop. Alex walked out as the doors opened and Aaron followed, but did not speak to him. Alexander knew Burr was watching him, though. His face flushed but he maintained the silence between the two of them. He walked out to his car without another word, the pair parting ways without so much as a goodbye. Alex wouldn't lie and say he was not the slightest bit sad about this fact but he still started up his car and began to drive out to 'La Révolutionnaire Cafe.'

It took about 15 minutes until he had arrived, listening to a political debating station through ears that may as well be deaf. In the end he wasn't even listening.

He grabbed his stuff and parked behind the cafe, unlocking the back door with a special staff's pin- 3604- and then took off his coat, hanging it up and putting his wallet and key into its pocket. As he was heading toward the bar he heard a familiar voice from nearby and then someone's arms were wrapping around his body. " _Bonjour, mon ami!_ " Laf chirped, smile stretched wide across their face.

Alex chuckled, halfheartedly returning his best friend's embrace which pretty much meant lifting his arm slightly to rest along the line of Lafayette's shoulders before letting it drop limply. He was too exhausted to give Laf anything better. " _Étais-je pas votre petit lion?_ " He replied, laughing slightly. Laf chimed in with his own awkward laughing, but they sounded much more enthusiastic.

Then John approached them. "Hi Alex. How you feeling?" His voice was dripping with condescension. Alex rolled his eyes and John chuckled affectionately. John liked to give Alexander shit, but they were still wonderful friends. Had been since middle school. Same with Lafayette.

If only Herc were here. Then the four musketeers would be together again. But he was busy with his studies at the FIT. Alex was happy for him. All Hercules had ever wanted was to become a student of a well-known fashion college and he had done just that. Alexander was proud that he was best friends with _the_ up and coming fashion designer of the modern age. One day Hercules would be famous, Alexander was totally sure of it. No one could convince him otherwise.

Oh shit, he'd gotten off track. That happened a lot.

"Much better." Alexander answered without any explanation, shrugging his shoulders. John followed him out to the front of the cafe, and Lafayette trailed right behind him. He went through a door at the end of the bar and into the kitchen. He began working on cleaning the dishes while John remained out in the main area, drawing on the blackboards that possessed the menu. He was currently sketching out a snow cone in white chalk. They were going to start selling those today, so at least John had an excuse for doodling on every surface possible. Alex wasn't going to deal with pencil markings on the tables again.

_Never. Again._

Anyways, Lafayette perched themself on the counter next to Laurens, watching him draw while singing in french. It was a nice song, one that Laf claimed was their favorite. Alex didn't doubt that claim- they sang it about 50 times a week. But they were also _really good._ So no one cared. Sometimes even the customers would listen. Lafayette enjoyed the attention, no doubt.

Once Laf had finished singing Alexander clapped, exiting the kitchen with a smile playing on his lips. John applauded as well and Laf's face revealed their inner indecision about what emotion to express. Bashfulness or sarcasm. Their face rested on sarcasm and they rolled their eyes. " _Merci, merci._ " John's datemate cooed, placing a tiny kiss on the tip of John's nose before they skipped over to the door, rotating the OPEN/CLOSED sign to OPEN.

John hung up the blackboard and Alex took a seat on a stool behind the counter.

The day passed fast. At some point Laf started singing 'Video Games' by Lana Del Rey. Time just flew right by.

Soon Alex was driving home without much recollection of locking up. But he was too caught up in his thoughts to think about work. As soon as he got back to the apartment he changed into pajamas and laid down in bed. Light streamed through the windows, but he could not bring himself to get up again. He was too tired to do anything but hunker down right on the mattress and stare at the wall.

He wasn't tired from lack of sleep. No, no. Tired of _something._ But he didn't know what.

And that was the worst part.


	7. July 15th

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaa im so sorry for how long it has taken me to make this!! i was on an unspoken hiatus, and i do apologize sincerely!! but heyy, here it is now so um please forgive me lmao
> 
> also hahahaha ignore my blatant plot holes with the whole passing of time lol

The remainder of the week passed by just as fast.

Soon enough, it was 5:04 pm on Friday and John was locking up the cafe. After this, Laf and John were leaving to meet up with Eliza and Herc. Apparently that had a date set up at the local carnival. Alexander tried his absolute best to appear happy for them.

Note the _tried._

Don't get me wrong, Alexander wanted for his friends to be happy, but it was a little bit difficult to achieve when they were living his dream. They were capable of exchanging loving kisses on cheeks and snuggling. They could flirt and openly act like stupid romantics around the people they loved. And then there was Alexander, all alone, with not even a sliver of a chance of dating the person he wished to.

But he still had to humor Lafayette and John. Every time they cracked jokes, kissed, hugged, or spoke to one another, Alex forced his lips to form into a supportive smile. At some point, Laf began attempting to chat with Alex, and he clenched his fists under the bar to keep from snapping at his friend.

"Oh, _petit lion_ , I am so _excité!_ " They cooed, smile stretched wide from ear to ear. Alex noted that his friend kept lifting their wrist to glance anxiously at their watch. With every passing minute, Laf's eyes grew brighter with anticipation of the night soon to come. Alexander was praying for a thing to focus on. His fingers were tapping against the bar, the other was clutching a teacup for dear life, and his eyes were scanning every square inch of the building. But within seconds it was not enough for him.

 _We need to clean up those cobwebs. Woah, where'd that crack in the wall come from? Maybe we should dust the paintings. Ugh, it's so empty in here._ Alex pondered, his thoughts panicked and desperate. He needed to escape this. He was quickly running out of distractions and it was killing him slowly.

Then a new distraction came, and Alexander found himself to be grinning. Just outside of the cafe stood none other than George Washington, a small pot in his gloved hands. John laughed and unlocked the door after the polite man knocked gingerly. He was strangely gentle for being 6'2''.

" _Bonjour_ sir!" Lafayette called to the man, offering Washington a joking salute that made George chuckle. John waved at the man, and George returned the gesture with a smile.

Alex met George's eyes from across the room. The other man had a knowing look on his face as he approached him. George set down the soil-filled pot on the bar. He was staring Alexander down with concern evident in his wise eyes. Alexander was shaking under his heavy gaze, but he held it until George opened his mouth to speak, turning to face Lafayette and John, who seemed confused.

"Sorry boys. I needed to drop this off for Alexander." The man remarked, pointing at the plant and then at Alexander. Laf and John turned their attention over to Alex and he sighed, rolling his eyes. They would never let this one down, would they? _Fun._

"It's fine, sir. We were just closing up, but you're an exception." John replied kindly, exchanging polite beams with George. "But anyways, Alex, it's all locked up so don't worry about it, whenever you leave. Laf and I are heading out, though. Bye George, Alex." John added, waving goodbye to the two remaining in the cafe. Alexander noticed Lafayette waiting outside the cafe for their boyfriend to exit. Alex returned the wave and then John left the building.

Alexander's eyes lifted to meet George's. The room was dead silent. Uncomfortable.

"So, son. Are you feeling alright? You're awfully pale. You also need to quit squeezing that cup, it's going to break." George said passively. Alex sighed and let go of the cup. It landed on a cloth laying on the counter.

"I'm fine, sir. I appreciate your concern." Alex replied, his words were quiet but aggressive. He lowered his gaze, and continued to avoid the older man's gaze. George obviously did not believe him.

"Sure, son. Anyways, it is the 15th, but I knew you were busy, so I brought the plant over. It's a zinnia." George informed, nudging the potted sprout closer to Alexander. Alex released a sigh as he looked back down at the soil. He clicked his tongue, trying to remember what zinnias represented. All he could remember was that scarlet zinnias were constancy, and Alexander found that fitting. His mind flashed back to the day Aaron comforted him.

Yes, this would work.

"Thank you sir. Have a good weekend." He said blankly as he grabbed the pot. George nodded his head and turned, heading toward the exit. Alex left soon after George did.

The drive home was just long enough to calm Alexander's growing nerves and then resurrect them from the dead. When he reached his apartment with the zinnia sprout in-hand he was trembling slightly, but he entered the elevator anyway. As he rose floor by floor his heart pounded faster. He didn't understand why he was so nervous. He had done this before.

Soon Alexander found himself standing before Aaron's door. He reached his fist forward to knock, and despite his fears, he did. Once. Twice. Then the door opened. Aaron took the zinnia, and the two of them shared small talk.

"Zinnia: constancy." Alexander said, his voice empty. Aaron smiled gently at him and then left Alex alone in the hallway.

As soon as he reached his apartment, Alexander tossed his body onto the couch and he screamed into his pillow. That _fucking smile though._

Aaron Burr was going to be the death of him, Alex swore on it.


End file.
